Handsy

If you read my post on PDA...then you know how I feel about PDA.  I’m fine with it as long as its in a sweet not so in-your-face type of display of affection; however, I’m not fine with guys who are too touchy feely or handsy.  It bugs me.  No one wants to see that.  Now, one form of PDA that is completely and utterly sickening to me is when a guy you barely know touches you.  I’m not talking just a high five or a poke on the shoulder.  I’m talking full on touching hips, lower back, neck, etc.  It’s effing creepy is what it is.  

This past weekend, my roommates and I hosted a little get together...which quickly evolved into a flip cup championship and a circle of death...death match.  I can sadly say that I suck at all drinking games, so I got a little tipsy (“Errbody in da club gettin’ tipsy!” Aw! Remember that song?!)  Anyway, there was a guy at this party that I had briefly socialized with at a previous party a ridiculously long time ago.  He was funny and seemed nice.  I remember the last time that we got along and that he seemed mildly interested, but I didn't really think anything of it.  Anyway, this past weekend he came over and we were getting along and talking and shit.  It was fun...UNTIL he started getting all handsy with me.  

At first it was a simple tap on the arm or the shoulder like he was just wanting to get my attention or trying to ask me a question.  Then it progressed to him touching my back and very oddly my hips.  I was thoroughly annoyed and was planning my escape plan from his touchy feely death trap.  Every time I separated myself from him, he would come over to me five minutes later and commence touching me.  Lastly, and this pissed me off like no other mother, he started touching my hair.  My hair, you guys! Not cool! He started to like brush it away from my neck and tuck it behind my ear.  Dude, I’ve only known you for a grand total of like two hours. STOP IT. I would inch myself away from him and flat out walk away from him.  He wasn’t getting the message and it was the most frustrating night of my life.  He was also the last person to leave.  He was coming on too strong, and it made me feel really uncomfortable.  After pretty much everyone had left, he came into my room (don't worry y'all; this story is not about to take any unfortunate turns) and started looking around.  I stood in the doorway and said, "Yeah so uhh I think I'm gonna go to bed soon.  So..." and pointed to the door.  He didn't get the message.  He started talking to me about The Walking Dead and my rain boots that were chillin' in front of my closet.  Finally, I walked out of my room, into the living room, and said, "I'm going to bed.  Bye." He left.  Nothing sketch ball happened and more importantly I got to go to sleep!!

I hope this isn't just me being a prude (I definitely DO NOT think it is), but when a guy you don't know very well is touchy feely with you and you are clearly not giving him the "ok" then he needs to stop immediately and back it up, son!  It is uncomfortable and awkward.  Now whenever I see this asshole it's going to be super awkward, and I will most likely completely ignore his presence.  

This scenario reminds me of a scene from Scrubs where Elliot's sorority sister comes into town to visit, and J.D. automatically likes her and wants to get in her pants.  They go out and the girl is very straightforward with him about where he's allowed to touch her.  Granted...she lets him make out with her, but it is still really funny watching J.D. attempt to make out with this girl without touching her at all.  I would probably not go to any extremes like that...also, if I am making out with a guy then that probably means that I have known him for a little while and I'm comfortable with it.  Ok, I just spent an embarrassingly long ten minutes trying to find the clip of J.D. making out with this girl on YouTube but couldn't find it ANYWHERE.  So, I have decided to share this gem with you.  Behold, JD and Turk walk into a club.  Of course, I have to ask: what are your thoughts on this matter?  Definitely not ok, right? Riiiiiight? Right?! (Feel free to express your true opinions.  I won't judge...I'll just roll my eyes a little.)